Grief and Pain: Why My Grief Is Worse Than Your Grief

Once upon a time, another blogger was cautioning against the fruitlessness of the “pain olympics” in a support community. (I can’t remember who you are, so if you’re out there reading, please step forward to take credit.) I thought this post did a really nice job of honoring all the different perspectives of this community in an effort, as I interpreted it, to fuse back together this broken bone. Real support begins with mutual empathy.

Mindy Minix

*Trigger warning–this post discusses pregnancy, child loss and infertility. 

Pregnancy–the wondrous means needed to perpetuate the human race. The reproductive process holds mysteries and miracles alike. Our living situations during a pregnancy or leading up to a birth can make pregnancy a wonderful, joyous journey to parenthood or a fear-filled burden resulting in a different life than the one envisioned. It’s one of those things that can’t be fully described to someone else. No one’s experience with pregnancy and childbirth is exactly like someone else’s experience. It is a unique process that changes each time someone reproduces. You have to experience it to understand the power that reproduction contains. Given that I had difficulty conceiving this child I’m carrying right this moment, I am sensitive to how insensitive that last sentence is for those that cannot conceive and carry a live baby to term. For some, there is nothing in…

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